B.A.R.T. 1999
 
 

Space Quest V: The Next Mutation

Warning: The following is a solution for Space Quest V. Please, DO NOT READ FROM START TO FINISH. You'll just ruin the game. But what do you care - you wanted to win bad enough to go online and look it up, eh? Have fun, yah big cheater...

Space Quest V - The Next Mutation
 

Here's the solve:
 

Go north. Enter classroom to take test.
No matter what choices you make on the test, you'll pass. You get in trouble for being late so you have to clean the crest. Go south. Open the janitor closet and take the pylons and the waxer.
 

Go south then east. Stand on the teleporter to go down to the crest. Place the pylons on the floor. Place the waxer on the floor and open it up to use it. Clean all dirty spots (it's timed, so if you don't do it in the amount of time you have, you lose the game). Crest is now cleaned.

Quirk and Wankmeister talk to you a bunch. Go west. A mouse jumps into the test computer and farks up the scores. Game locks up. Load up save game #0 included in this package.
 

The mouse gets fried and the machine gives you a perfect score on the SAT (Starcon Aptitude Test). While this happens, a conference is going on with the admiral, ambassador, and a bunch of other people. the ambassador is on everyone out to try and get them to take action against people who illegally dump wastes on her planet. They halfheartedly agree to get off their asses and do something to get her to shut up. The whole time Wilco is eavesdropping on them, and when the ambassador walks out of the room, Wilco falls on his ass because he was leaning up against the door. Anyway, because of your high grade on the SAT, you are promoted to captain or something and are in charge of a garbage scow.
 

Talk to Flo. Hail Starcon for clearance to leave. Talk to Droole and lay in coordinates for Gangularis (71552). Lite speed. When Droole tells you that you are approaching the planet, change to Regular speed. Activate the RRS (Refuse Removal System).
 

You'll be notified that there is a life form in the waste compartment. Get out of chair and open the trash (white door on the right). An aliens creature will hop out and stick on your face, then walk away. While you're here click on the toolbox. Get the laser torch, fuse,
hole punch,
antacids.
Go to the Engineering room (door on left). Walk out and then back in and Spike will be there. Walk to lower left corner. Put him in the specimen container on the right (the red glass jar).
Put the antacids in the container to calm him down.
 

Go to the bridge and lay in a course for Peeyu (92767). Once there, activate the RRS.
You'll intercept a message about a dirty deed going down. Lay in a course for Kiz Urazgubi (kiss your ass goodbye) (20011). You get caught in a tractor beam and are hailed by a bounty hunter because of your mail fraud in SQ3. She tells you to beam down to the planet. Go to the Engineering room and beam down.
 

You'll start on a screen with a waterfall and pool. Go to the northwest corner into the mouth of the cave FAST! because the she is gonna try and zap you. Go east. Click the hand icon on the BRANCH (not the log). The branch snaps and you fall down. Get the stick.
Go back to the log screen. Click the walk icon on the log to get to the other side. Hit the bananas with the stick. While they're swinging, take a banana.
Crawl back through the log and then go west. Enter the left cave. You'll be on a waterfall screen. Enter the left cave. You'll come out on the left side at the top. Jump across and climb up to the boulder. Use the stick to knock the boulder loose.
 

You knock the her silly. Go back down to the pool where you started out. She is still alive, but her cloaking device is gone. Go to the log screen and climb in the middle. She will land on top and look for you. Stick the banana in her jetpack.
She will blow up. Climb back out and get her head.
Go back down to where you started. Cliffy is there and you talk to him. You get beamed back.
 

Go out of Engineering and go back in. Cliffy is fixing up the robot. You will automatically give him the robot head and he'll give you a remote control. Beam down (Cliffy comes with you). Use the remote control on yourself.
The ship is now uncloaked. Stand on the platform to enter the ship. The game will lock up here if you touch the panel. Load up save game #1. Click on the panel on the right. You are now looking at the cloaking device. Click on the top latch then the bottom latch. Turn all 4 dials so they are diagonal. Click on the panel to the left of the upper left lock. It will open. Do the same for the lower right lock. It will open. Turn the remaining 2 locks so they are both straight. Click on the panel for the upper right lock. It will open. Do the same for the lower left lock. It will open. Get the cloaking device.
Run out FAST!
 

Now you're back on the ship. Go to the bridge and lay in coordinates for the Starcon Academy (69869). After you change to Regular speed, enter Standard Orbit. Grab Spike from the container. Beam down.

Sit down with your friends at the table on the left side. Some guy will come up and give you free Space Monkeys and his business card. Quirk will approach you next and challenge you to a game of Battle Cruiser. Beat em. If you don't beat him, you don't get the points. Cliffy gets in a brawl and is taken away to jail. Talk to Flo and Droole to figure out an escape plan. You have to make a distraction, so put the Space Monkeys in your drink. They will multiply and take over the station.
Walk east and the guards will run off to try and stop the monkeys. Click on the panel to shut the shields off.
Click the hand icon on the 2nd cell. Use Spike on the cell so he will pee acid all over it and melt it away.
Go west to teleport back to your ship.
 

Put Spike back in his container and then go to the bridge. You'll get a message to head to Clorox II. Lay in a course for 90210. Standard orbit. Ask your Science Officer (the orange button by your right hand) to scan the planet. Beam down.
 

You're on a desert type planet. Go in the big building. Click on the computer in the center of the room. You'll be attacked by a loogy monster. Dodge his loogy blasts 5 times. Droole will then shoot him. the monster will transform back into a man. He grunts something about looking to the west for a secret path. Get the piece of paper he dropped. Look at the computer. Punch in 80869 (the code on the paper). Leave the building. Walk to the lower left corner (secret path). On the close-up shot, look at the container.
Beam up.
 

Go to the bridge. You get a weak emergency signal from the Goliath. An animation sequence is played. You're told that the Goliath is in the Thrakus system. Lay in a course for 53284. Standard orbit. Go down to the docking bay. Get the rebreather mask (panel to the left of the suits).
Get the oxygen tank to the left of the mask.
Go to Engineering and put the mask on.
Beam down.
 

Walk to the pod and look inside it. Grab the coat.
Push the red button to shut off the homing beacon.
Walk to the left until you are jumped by the girly. It's Wankmeister! You fight and end up hanging onto the edge of the mushroom. Before she falls, use the coat.
Use the communicator on yourself.
Wankmeister will drop a vine to you. Grab the vine.
You barely escape. Once back on your ship, she's sick. She gives you a warpdrive distributor cap she stole from the Goliath. Open the Cryo chamber.
Put her in the Cryo chamber.
Look at the panel in the lower left corner. Put her on Cryo for 10 seconds.
 

Go to the bridge. Your ship will be attacked. Tell Droole to do Evasive Action. Tell him to head for the asteroid field.
 

Cliffy goes outside to fix some stuff. He ends up floating off into space and you have to rescue him. Go down to the docking bay. Enter the EVA. Watch your fuel gauge. Maneuver yourself so you are in front of Cliffy and until you see a green box on his chest. A message will say "Target in range". Extend the claw and push the button with your thumb to grab him. Head back to your ship.
 

Once back inside, Cliffy is all fine. Go to the bridge and lay in a course for the Space Station that was mentioned on Clorox II (41666). Standard orbit.
Beam down.
 

A fly will enter the teleporter at the same time and fark you up. It's unavoidable. You'll turn into a fly. Your communicator will drop on the ground. Click on the part where the water meets the green grass. A frog will try to catch you and lands on your communicator, turning it on. Land on the communicator.
Talk to Flo. She says the teleporter is broken, but will tell Cliffy that you are a fly. Now go to the west (click on the right side of the hill on the right side of the screen). Click on the dumpster. You'll be on a screen with a waterfall and a card slot. Click on the card slot.

When you walk through the card slot, note which laser beams affect which locking mechanisms. You'll need it later. Land on the computer screen. Clicking on Security lets you see what's going on outside. Click on Projects and keep doing Next until you see Project X.
Click on Accounting to see that Quirk was bribed.
Fly back outside. Click on Cliffy.
Take Cliffy to the dumpster where your body is so he can fix you. Your body will jump out. Click on your body.
You'll then be teleported by Cliffy to fix you up.
 

Use the hole punch on the business card.
Make an X pattern on the business card so the lasers will go through.

Use the new business card on the slot to get back in. Get the liquid nitrogen containers that are in the cabinet near the stairs. Go back out. WD40 will return your communicator to you and she will beam back up. Tell Cliffy to beam you up.
 

Spike will jump around, trying to convey a message to you. Tell Cliffy to reverse the teleportation process. Look at the Cryo chamber. Look at the control panel. Put Beatrice on Defrost for 10 seconds. Pick up Beatrice and put her on the teleporter. Cliffy will kick the machinery to fix it.
Beatrice is all fine now but will rest in the Cryo chamber. Talk to WD40 to get the plan of action. Go to the bridge and lay in a course for Commodore LXIV (64, get it?) (81100). As soon as you get there, they tell you that the Goliath will be in sight in 10 seconds. Call up Cliffy (the green button by your right hand). Tell him to cloak the ship. He will tell you to come to Engineering. Walk back there.

Cliffy will tell you where to land the pod (where the least amount of Pukazoids are at). Go back down to the docking bay and get in the EVA. Click the hand icon on the part of the ship immediately to the right of the engines. You'll connect up to the ship. Use the laser torch on the hull of the ship.
You automatically walk in the ship.
 

Wait until the guard has left the room. Walk up to the computer in the middle. Put the warpdrive distributor cap back.
Wait for the guard to come back in and leave. Creep to the door. Click on the grate in the middle of the hallway.
 

You're on level 8 in the service tunnels. Go north,east then north.You're now in the elevator shaft. Climb up the ladder as high as you can and enter the small door at the top. You should now be in level 6. Go South, West, North, North, East, North.
 

Climb up. Enter the top door. You should now be in level 4. Go South, West, North, North, West, West, North.
 

Climb up. Enter the top door. You should now be in level 2. Go South, South, West, South, East, South.
Click on the button. Pull it down.
 

A Loogy monster grabs you. Big animation sequence. Once inside the teleporting room, wait for ALL of the monsters to be on the platform and give Cliffy a command so he'll beam up back to normal. You don't know where Quirk is, so you head back to the bridge. You see Quirk fly into the blob in space. Flo calls you and asks what you want to do. Tell her to beam you back over.
 

Go to the bridge. Give Droole a command to Fire.
The blob will float towards your ship. Tell Droole to activate the RRS to suck the monster into the garbage bay.
 

You're screwed. Push the red button by your right hand to get the self- destruct mechanism up. Push the button on the left to start it. Go to the Engineering room. Get Beatrice out of the Cryo chamber. Stand on the energizer platform. It blows out! Run to the fuse tunnel and pull out the fuse in the middle from the front row. Put the new fuse you got a long time ago in its place.
 

Go to the Engineering room. The blob will be oozing out of the garbage container. Jump into the Engineering room. Get Spike out of his container.
Stand on the teleporter and energize!

That's it. You're done.